Stuff

So, let me just say for the record that husbands who abuse or cheat on their wives (and then kick them out with the kids and the wife is pregnant too)are stinky, very stinky.

Anyways, thankfully things here have settled down for the time being...hopefully I haven't spoken too soon. I am growing to love these people more and more everyday it will be so hard to leave them here in a month and a half.
In the midst of all the crazy things that happpen here- and I do me crazy in the literal since of the word and all of the frustrating things that happen here, there are always precious moments that far out weigh the stresses and burdens of working in a shelter. Nothing makes me want to just cry out of sheer joy than these children. They are here not because of something that they have done. The other day I was getting ready to scold a child for running away from his mother and towards me, but before I could get the ever popular phrase "Where's your mother?" out of my mouth, he was at my knees squeezing them with all his might and he looked at me and said "I love you "...melts my heart. Then another precious child, as I was in the process of going to my room, looked up at me and asked me to give her a kiss before I left. Then there's the little girl who calls me Cakey, that totally makes me smile! Gosh, I do love kids but I don't want any of my own until I'm at least 30 (sorry mom, not yet- I will have you know that my coworkers are on a mission to get me the hook up in Tulsa so I'll come back...) haha.

Watching these children reminds me of what it means to have a child like faith. These kids (man my Educ teachers at APSU would get me for using that term) love when they are shown love, no questions asked. Sometimes you have to correct them but yet they still love you afterwards.

I think as adults we very much view things in regards to situations and forget what it's like to just have faith and not question. To fully trust God with everything, to put our rational minds aside and asume the views of children...

"They say that I can move the mountains and send them crashing to the sea, they say that I could walk on water if I would follow and believe, with faith like a child" Jars of Clay

To be finshed later- we've spotted a beaver outside and I must go teach the ladies the beaver song! Beaver on beaver all let's all do the beaver call! Good stuff!

Reminder...

10Yet it was the will of the LORD to crush him;
he has put him to grief;
when his soul makes an offering for sin,
he shall see his offspring; he shall prolong his days;
the will of the LORD shall prosper in his hand.
11 Out of the anguish of his soul he shall see and be satisfied;
by his knowledge shall the righteous one, my servant,
make many to be accounted righteous,
and he shall bear their iniquities.
12 Therefore I will divide him a portion with the many,
and he shall divide the spoil with the strong,
because he poured out his soul to death
and was numbered with the transgressors;
yet he bore the sin of many,
and makes intercession for the transgressors.

Isaiah 53:10-12

CrAzY

So, the past few days have been crazy and my sister is here experiencing it with me...with that said, here's my theme song for the week:

Craziness, craziness is what I long for. Craziness is what I need...
(I had to call the behavioral health people to come get a lady and I had to call an ambulance to come get another lady...and that's just the tip of the iceberg). It's nice having a job that keeps you on your toes. I think I really wore out my sister, though. She slept to well past noon today.

2 months from today and I will be back in Nashville for a week. It doesn't seem like I've been here that long. And in 2 months and 10 days I will be in Charleston. Boy does time fly when you never have time to stop.

Broken Hearted

"You can only go so far till the bottom falls out"

The past few days this song verse seems to be echoing in my mind. What would bring a parent to get drunk/high and to not show up so that the child has to be taken away at night by cops to a DHS shelter, scared and alone? My heart is so broken for this child. It just goes to show that when we are not being accountable for our actions and willingly allowing our sin to be in control- we will be exposed, in some way. It's easy to hide for a while but it will be exposed. This precious child couldn't pick her mom. We all thought her mom was doing so well and we even thought she was a very delightful person, but obvioulsy getting that fix was more importnat than her child. My prayers are with this family.

Having said all that it makes me so thankful for several reasons. I am first so thankful for a God who will never leave us or forsake us, a love that edifies and sees past imperfections. Yet again, that reminder of Agape love...love that is pure and perfect. I am also thankfully for my family, even as crazy and strange as I sometimes think they are at times. I am blessed b/c I never had to be taken away. I had everything I needed.

It also reminds me just how important it is to truly confess our sins before God. "If we confess our sins He is faithful and just to forgive us and cleanse us from all unrighteousness" 1st John 1:9. Anything we attempt to hide from Him will be exposed in some way or form. He is God and He already knows, but He wants us to admit to what we've done, whether we think it's big or small.

This situation again reminds me of how very "me centered" we can be. How easy it is for our focus to become about making ourselves feel good for the moment and not caring about the consequences or those that it might harm. As Christians, we are called to put others first. Some one once challenged me to go with out saying any personal pronouns for a day, at let's just say that it was one of the hardest things to do.

Some things I love about DSV

Ok, so y'all have had the privilege of listening to my struggles but above all there are so many wonderful things about what I do. I want to share those blessing with you. So, here they are:

1. The guests. Although they can frustrate me, they are precious and I grow to love them more and more every day. I praise God for the opportunites I get to spend with them, whether it's being silly or serious. They have needs and I get to be used by God to meet those needs. What a privilege!

2. Their children. There are some days I think I ask the questions "Where is you mom?" and "Why aren't you with her?" a million and one time and I see many tantrums thrown. But, they make me smile. They are so precious and it's not thier fault they are in this situation. I look foward to their knee hugs every day! The other day I got dubbed as "Cakey" by a 2 year old girl! It was so sweet. I mean, who doesn't enjoy loving on children or sitting and watching the most beautiful babies ever as they sleep? What lessons we can learn from these children!

3. The staff. I love being able to work with like minded people! It in many ways is like working at camp- tons of personalities (well, except for the fact that in age we range from 23 to 80). My co-workers rock! Except for the fact that they are on a mission to get me the "hook up" (well, not all of them but most...cracks me up. Now the guest have gotten the same idea as well. I usually just laugh at them and remind them that I'm leaving in May or course the response to that is "You'll be back, the last semester missionary was here for two year")

4. The volunteers. There is a volunteer couple that sold thier home and moved up here to serve. I mean, what more can you say. Most of the regular volunteers work their tales off to help us get things done. We couldn't survive with out them!

5. The environmnet. It's such a blessing to live and work in a place where the presence of God is very evident. I don't know that I've been in any other shelter that is as loving. It's been amazing to watch these ladies grow spiritually as well as mentally and physically. Don't get me wrong, there have been some "moments" but thankfully, those are rare.

6. Some many blessings and yet a ton of the time I am way to busy to notice. God is really showing me about what it means to balance the physical tasks that must be done with the spiritual duty that I have to these ladies. I guess you could say learning to balance between Mary and Martha.

fun fact

So, does everyone realzie that today is 03/04/05? haha kinda cool, isn't it??!!

Life goes on...

OK, so now that I'm done with my complaining (Phil 2:14), thanks for letting me vent. I know thing will all work out in God's timing. And really the delay is going to be only about 2 months or so. I am so thankful that this is all that I have to gripe and complain about, there are people who are dealing wiht much harder things. OK, so that's all for now! Peace out!